Dear Katie Holmes – From A Single Dad

Have you heard the news about Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes’ roaring rumor of a divorce? The whole world has been very curious about this hot Hollywood issue. News, gossips and paparazzi are fiery about this shocking and controversial tidbit. This time around though, it has been confirmed; it is true.  Holmes has filed for a divorce from her husband, Tom Cruise, a very popular actor known internationally. Although Katie Holmes is definite that she wants freedom from her husband, still, there’s a ramification which she will be need to face soon — and that is being a single mom. 

The Controversial Divorce

Yes, Katie Holmes has admitted that her marriage with Tom Cruise has gone through a topsy-turvy journey. According to her, there are some issues in their relationship that she’s no longer happy with, especially with Cruise’s controversial religion of choice. Unlike the Christian faith, Scientology believes that science has the answer to everything.  This means that God is no longer recognized. Holmes also feared that her lovely daughter, Suri, will be sent to a Scientology organization by Cruise, which she strongly opposes. 

In addition, she admitted that she wants to end her marriage to Cruise legally via divorce. Holmes has been spotted without a wedding ring; but, she has been showing a fresh and happy aura. Does it mean that she’s really at peace about the divorce? 

Most individuals who have recently been divorced try to convince themselves and even the public that they are happy after the divorce. However, in reality, they are suffering within and are dealing with emotional pains. In fact, individuals have lost their self-esteem and even their goals in life after a divorce. 

Furthermore, Katie Holmes has also declared that she wants to have custody of their daughter, Suri. She really doesn’t like the idea of sending her daughter away to be educated in Cruise’s religion of Scientology. Her reaction to Cruise’s plan for their daughter is just a typical reaction of a mother. Katie may be quite sure with her decision on their divorce and the custody of their daughter. But, is she really ready to become a single mother? 

Tips For Katie Holmes as Single Motherhood Looms

No one dreams on their wedding date that it will ultimately end in a divorce, right? In fact, most people want to spend their happy-ever-after with the love of their life; that’s why they tie the knot in the first place. I suspect “Tomcat” and Katie were no different, in the beginning. However, their pending divorce just goes to show not even the rich and famous are immune to reality checks. 

The truth is, divorce has a number of consequences, especially if you have kids. Through divorce, Katie Holmes will be counted among the increasing number of single mothers around the globe. Becoming a single mother is very challenging. She will be facing heavy burdens that will test her not only as a person but also as a mother. But, with the help of her loved ones, friends and her daughter, life can still be full of hope and love. 

These tips will be very helpful for any upcoming single mother like Katie in facing the most challenging chapter in their lives: 

Get inspiration from your child.

For sure, mothers are quite aware that their lives have changed from the moment they conceive their child. You lost your self-centeredness and you become a selfless individual because of your child. Thus, if things get worse and you feel that life is no longer desirable, just take a glance at your child. For sure, you will regain your strength. There’s no other more powerful inspiration than your child. 

Don’t share your loneliness and pains with your child.

This is one of the most crucial things that single parents, especially the mothers, have failed to do. After the divorce, they tend to live their lives like a messy trash. They tend to forget that there are other lives that are dependent on them. Thus, if you will act and speak negatively or hopelessly in front of your child, you will already be starting to ruin their future. If you really love your child, don’t let him/her feel your loneliness and pains. Instead of indulging that feeling of weakness, lavish them with your love, care and attention. In this way, you will also be helping yourself to move on. 

Keep on keepin’ on.

This is the most important thing that you need to consider. Your life doesn’t stop the moment you divorce your spouse. At first, it will be very hard and difficult. But with the right motivation and inspiration, everything will fall into the right place. You will begin to see life with a new perspective. If you need finances for your child, then it’s time to go back to work. Get exposed to the real world. 

So, if you want to avoid a messy life after the divorce or if you want to prove that you can raise your child alone as a single parent, you might as well consider the abovementioned tips.

Image: by Jay Tamboli via Flickr.

Daniel Ruyter is a single dad and author of the dating rules book for single parents, Memoirs of a Dating Dad.