When you are newlyweds, you may be feeling so in love that it is hard to imagine anything ruining your bliss. The truth of the matter, however, is that almost fifty percent of marriages end in divorce! This can be a rather sobering statistic, and that is why it is so important for you to get your marriage off on the right foot! The seeds for a marriage are planted from the moment that you meet your significant other, but what can you do when the rings are on and the wedding bells have gone quiet?
Think About Your Money
The thing about money is that everyone thinks that everyone handles theirs in the exact same way. Some couples are resolute about combining accounts, while other couples maintain separate accounts throughout very happy marriages. Who is going to be the money manager? Do you have similar money goals and philosophies? Talk about things like savings and money management soon after you are wed. At the very least, it makes paying for the honeymoon and the wedding bills a little more simple!
Ask Each Other Questions
One of the issues of our culture and our society is that we associate the “getting to know you” part of the relationship to occur at the beginning, while you are still dating. There is something final about getting married, and some people have the idea that their development simply freezes in place. The truth of the matter is that we continue to grow and change, and if we do not do it together, than we will do it apart. Continue to talk and to learn about each other.
Name Annoyances Right Away!
We have all heard the joke about the man who does something irritating for years and years until it drives his wife to divorce. There’s a cultural myth that people who are married are mind readers, when the truth is that for the most part, people need to be told things if they are to get them at all. If your new spouse does something that irritates you, let them know right away. This is something that can save you literally years of stress down the line.
Don’t Have a Pet or a Baby Right Away
Some people think that as soon as they are married, they should settle down and have children or pets. The truth is that you are still learning about each other. You knew each other as people who were dating, so why not give yourself the chance to learn about each other as married people before you need to learn about each other as parents? Remember that marriage is a very intense life-changing affair. Give yourself some time to settle into it before you commit to another big lifestyle change.
See Other People
One thing that often sinks marriages is the isolation. You can love your significant other as much as you want, but there is realistically no way for them to meet all of your needs. Even if you are newly married, you will discover that it is good for you to make sure that you are staying in touch with the people who are important to you, like your friends and your family. There is nothing stopping you from having strong relationships outside of your marriage, and in the long run, it is good for you and your significant other.
If you are someone who has recently just gotten married, be willing to think about how you can make your start as strong as possible. Follow these hints and you will find your relationship getting closer and more solid than ever!
Marcie has been working with couples and individuals for over 8 years. Helping them start off right, strengthen and enhance their relationships and even avoid divorce. Her company, Love Your Relationship, focuses on private couples retreats.